you know you're too drunk when...

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brusier

brusier

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you make toast.... the as a topping you put your knife in the milk and then spread the milk like its butter... was not good toast
 
Breaka

Breaka

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brisneyland said:
Or you get home, stand at the foot of the bed, piss on both your bed and your previously sleeping girlfriend and then sleep in the mess you just made.
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Last weekend my brother pissed in a clothes basket full of clean clothes.

A related story. Staying at my godfathers one night when he and my Auntie came home blind drunk after a wedding reception. He came into my cousins room where I had been sleeping on the floor and pissed all over my head. Fucks me what he was thinking but he didn't even realise until I told him in the morning.
 
slip

slip

Beefcake...BEEFCAKE!!!
brisneyland said:
Or you get home, stand at the foot of the bed, piss on both your bed and your previously sleeping girlfriend and then sleep in the mess you just made.
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Breaka said:
Last weekend my brother pissed in a clothes basket full of clean clothes.

A related story. Staying at my godfathers one night when he and my Auntie came home blind drunk after a wedding reception. He came into my cousins room where I had been sleeping on the floor and pissed all over my head. Fucks me what he was thinking but he didn't even realise until I told him in the morning.
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Holy shit at the piss stories being seemingly common! Geez...

Good stories though.
 
Breaka

Breaka

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Another piss story.

A mates older brother had come home completely retarded one night. Opened up the oven, pissed in it and turned it on. Completely fucked the oven and house smelt like burnt piss for a while.
 
slip

slip

Beefcake...BEEFCAKE!!!
Well there's one I can't post on the internet...

I did see a guy who looked like a real life Sideshow Bob having sex with a total slut on my bed, moments after we spoke about the huge amounts of poor form involved. My bed. There were these 2 massive red mung patches. Luckily we were in the Netherlands so there were heaps of blankets. We removed them, and thank fuck, the bed was safe.
 
juzzo

juzzo

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When your keen as to go clubbing, so you get changed, attempt to put on some shoes and trip over into bed and pass out
 
Breaka

Breaka

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When you start hedge diving. Dove into many a hedges on Sat night. Hands are so fucked from it, still picking splinters out. Damn those smart bastards who plant spikey hedges are the joint.
 
GravityGuru

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Breaka said:
When you start hedge diving. Dove into many a hedges on Sat night. Hands are so fucked from it, still picking splinters out. Damn those smart bastards who plant spikey hedges are the joint.
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I also took place in some epic hedge diving on sat. Have many a bruise and cut to show for it
 
mad_mike51

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When you start taking on for sale signs :p I remember one night we took down every sign on a about 1km long street, except we still had the presence of mind to leave our mates one up.
 
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S

Sean

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<3 hedge diving.

You know you're too drunk when you ask a co worker out, and tell them they have soft hands.

EDIT - You know you're too drunk when it seems fun to get out the old multi grips and start stealing signs. On a well lit main road.
 
mx_sic

mx_sic

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Okay, not me, but a mate.

You know your too drunk when your girfriend wants it, really bad, but you are too drunk to really care. When she gets you on the ground and starts dry-rooting you, you can't even get it up, until that is, you fall asleep, THEN the blood starts to flow:p You then wake up to the sound of your girlfriend abusing you and slapping you in the face.

Funny night that...:rolleyes:
 
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