Confessions from the fuckwits

pink poodle

気が狂っている男
Surely some was salvageable??
Murphy's Law (maybe?) The good stuff (the golden mash potato) all landed topside down.

I feel your pain @wesdadude ! I dropped an apple and mulberry crumble on my friends doorstep one night because I thought fuck 2 hands I'm macho!

I cooked roast pork for dinner. I wanted to cook he crackling seperate for maximum crunch. So while the lump of meat rested in went the skin...30 minutes later and no real progress I notice that I must have turned the oven down to about 20 degrees when I pulled the pork out! Crackling was salvageable, but only just.
 

leitch

Feelin' a bit rrranty
Swapping from coil shock back to air for a change (and to shed 500g) last night after washing the bike post weekend mudfest. Absentmindedly remove top shock bolt first (forward shock mount under top tube) while thinking about something else (yeah, I know). Weight of the rear triangle slips it from the mount, heavy piggyback reservoir falls, clattering into top of downtube. "Imagine being the dickhead who chips his paint like that" Andrew thinks to himself as he lifts the shock to reveal a big ugly paint chip straight through to the carbon. Facepalm. Nailpolish to the rescue once again.
 

moorey

call me Mia
Swapping from coil shock back to air for a change (and to shed 500g) last night after washing the bike post weekend mudfest. Absentmindedly remove top shock bolt first (forward shock mount under top tube) while thinking about something else (yeah, I know). Weight of the rear triangle slips it from the mount, heavy piggyback reservoir falls, clattering into top of downtube. "Imagine being the dickhead who chips his paint like that" Andrew thinks to himself as he lifts the shock to reveal a big ugly paint chip straight through to the carbon. Facepalm. Nailpolish to the rescue once again.
Damn sticky mud, hey! I luckily washed mine immediately seeing I was done early. Felix got around to his last night, and it had set like a rock by then.
Sticker time!
 

Ultra Lord

Hurts. Requires Money. And is nerdy.
Swapping from coil shock back to air for a change (and to shed 500g) last night after washing the bike post weekend mudfest. Absentmindedly remove top shock bolt first (forward shock mount under top tube) while thinking about something else (yeah, I know). Weight of the rear triangle slips it from the mount, heavy piggyback reservoir falls, clattering into top of downtube. "Imagine being the dickhead who chips his paint like that" Andrew thinks to himself as he lifts the shock to reveal a big ugly paint chip straight through to the carbon. Facepalm. Nailpolish to the rescue once again.
That’ll teach to you to be a weight weenie.
 

DougalStrachan

Likes Dirt
Long time ago I thought to myself - I'd best do a lower leg service on the Pikes.......

<time passes>
Ohhh better do that fork........

<more time passes>
Yep I'll do those seals today.......

<fade effect>
Ahh a quick clean and drop some oil on the stanchions, good enough.......

<enter stage left a fat guy on a bike naval gazing as he's marshalling the kids race>
Hmm, those stanchions look faded. A quick inspection later I've worn thru some of the coating and got some scratches

Fuckwit! All done now but I'll feel shame every time I look at the bloody scratches
 

PJO

in me vL comy
Long time ago I thought to myself - I'd best do a lower leg service on the Pikes.......

<time passes>
Ohhh better do that fork........

<more time passes>
Yep I'll do those seals today.......

<fade effect>
Ahh a quick clean and drop some oil on the stanchions, good enough.......

<enter stage left a fat guy on a bike naval gazing as he's marshalling the kids race>
Hmm, those stanchions look faded. A quick inspection later I've worn thru some of the coating and got some scratches

Fuckwit! All done now but I'll feel shame every time I look at the bloody scratches
Oooh, that reminds me, better go do my forks...
 

moorey

call me Mia
Long time ago I thought to myself - I'd best do a lower leg service on the Pikes.......

<time passes>
Ohhh better do that fork........

<more time passes>
Yep I'll do those seals today.......

<fade effect>
Ahh a quick clean and drop some oil on the stanchions, good enough.......

<enter stage left a fat guy on a bike naval gazing as he's marshalling the kids race>
Hmm, those stanchions look faded. A quick inspection later I've worn thru some of the coating and got some scratches

Fuckwit! All done now but I'll feel shame every time I look at the bloody scratches
Have done the same, forgetting Felix does 5x the km of any of my one bikes.
 

Lucaw

Next in line
So, I decided to swap the dampers between my z150 and my dj2. I Thought “oh, I can just swap the dampers, no need to drop the lowers”. But the damper doesn’t want to be free so I preceded to undo the spring side. A loud “bang” insued and the bolt flew of into the air. Luckily my head wasn’t over it as there is a small dent in the ceiling where it hit. Now I need to look for a small bolt in the cluttered workshop. Fuck
 

fjohn860

Alice in diaperland
Got my first tube puncture in like 15yrs on the single speed commuter.

Pulled one side of the tyre bead off the rim, yanked the tube out a bit. Pumped it up, found the leak, patched it. Tyre back on the bead and start inflating with the bike pump only to find it still won't hold air.

Pull one side of the tyre bead off the rim again to find there is a second puncture next to the first one. Fkn double pinch flat, should've test inflated before remounting the first time
 

beeb

Dr. Beebenson, PhD HA, ST, Offset (hons)
Last night was my first ride with a new rear tyre. New rear tyre has a "DH" casing (Probably not quite a true DH casing, but a fraction burlier than a Maxxis DD), so is a fairly hefty tyre - especially for a semi-slick.

Several times last night I found my mind thinking "Bloody hell this tyre's hard work going uphill", only to look down and realise I was riding two or three gears heavier than I thought I was. Confirmation bias is a hell of a thing! o_O

Got some good leg training in I guess... :oops:
 

nathanm

Eats Squid
Joined the prestigious club of people who carry their bike on the roof of their car and then drive into shit.

Thankfully only the handlebars hit but still managed to rip the brake lever clean off.

Hoping to not find any other incidental damage but still frustrating as im half way though a 2 day trip to St Helens.

Have been pulled out of the shit by the awesome guys at Gravity Isle who are sticking me on a hire e-bike for a discounted price so i can still ride tomorrow.
 

fjohn860

Alice in diaperland
Joined the prestigious club of people who carry their bike on the roof of their car and then drive into shit.

Thankfully only the handlebars hit but still managed to rip the brake lever clean off.

Hoping to not find any other incidental damage but still frustrating as im half way though a 2 day trip to St Helens.

Have been pulled out of the shit by the awesome guys at Gravity Isle who are sticking me on a hire e-bike for a discounted price so i can still ride tomorrow.
The only things a car roof is good for are collecting bird shit and carrying surfboards.
 
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